Losing the Weight of the World

A Spiritual Diet to Nourish the Soul

Interview

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What is the "weight of the world"?
You distinguish between personality and Spirit. Can you explain?
What do you mean by spiritual?
Why does the spiritual lighten our burdens?
What's your background?
Why did you write Losing the Weight of the World?
Your last book was about sex. Why spirituality now?
Tell us about Losing the Weight of the World.
You've mentioned that we need to 'extract the nutrients' from our daily life. Can you give us an example?
What's the Spiritual Diet and what will it do for me?
Tell us more about your book.
What's the Basic Spiritual Diet?
You talk a lot about awareness and presence. Why are they so important?
Is prayer or meditation important?
You emphasize Basic Goodness. What do you mean by it?
What do you mean by excessive individualism? And why did you devote a whole chapter to it?
Why does Losing the Weight of the World matter?

What is the "weight of the world"?

As we race through our day, daily life weighs us down with chores, careers and children. We're busy trying to survive, get food on the table and keep a roof over our heads. We all carry these common burdens to one degree or another.

We're burdened with a great deal of responsibility. 20% of parents have two jobs in addition to raising their children, and 84% of today's parents believe their roles are tougher and more stressful than those of their own mothers and fathers.

Maybe we're self-critical and feel we're not good enough, and carry around a private sadness, shame or guilt that tightens our chest, and keeps us from getting enough oxygen, which makes us feel 'heavy'.

Maybe we're on edge, worried about the future -- our job, retirement, health or our children's college. As a result, we're carrying the weight of our insecurities and fears.

Maybe we're hiding emotional wounds and we fly from one task to another, as we keep busy to avoid becoming aware of our inner pain. Then we don't pay attention (maybe leading to carelessness, forgetfulness or accidents), and we don't fully enjoy our life.

Maybe we're tired out or feel life's on the decline. We fear we've already peaked and never knew it. We wonder what it's all for, and are weighted down by the sense we're missing something important in life.

Many of us carry around our burdens and wounds in secret, hiding them from others so they won't criticize or think less of us. Maybe we wish we could confess and find forgiveness, but we're not sure how to forgive ourselves. This makes all the burdens even heavier. We put on a happy face and stand as tall as we can under the weight of our private load. Often, we feel we have no choice, or don't even recognize we're carrying a burden.

But our burdens sap our energy and drive us to excess, be it shopping, food, work or stimulants and depressants, as we try to stand up under the stress and strain of it all and somehow make ourselves feel better.

We need something quick and easy and readily available, that nurtures and nourishes us both spiritually and psychologically. This the aim of the Spiritual Diet -- to give us a simple, quick and easy technique we can do on our own that will help us lose the weight of the world.

The Spiritual Diet feeds and energizes us by showing us how to find love, calm our racing mind, breathe more healthfully, and have daily moments of prayer, goodness, self worth, peace of mind and much more.

We can learn to extract the nutrients from the good we do, the people we love and who love us, the air we breathe -- all food for our psyche and Spirit that nourishes us and lightens the weight we're carrying.


You distinguish between personality and Spirit. Can you explain?

Personality is what we call "I" "me" or "myself". The Hindu's describe the personality as being like a set of masks that we use to represent different roles we play -- mother/father, son/daughter, secretary/doctor... -- and indeed, the word 'personality' comes from the Latin 'persona' meaning mask. So while our personality strives to survive and succeed and get our physical and psychological needs met, our spiritual nature is the eternal part of us that operates behind all of personality's masks.

We want a meaningful life, but we're worried about the mortgage, the credit card bills, college expenses and the retirement fund. So we're busy and preoccupied that meaning and spirituality has gotten gets lost in the midst of it all.


What do you mean by spiritual?

It's that part of us that we call God, Jesus, Buddha nature, the Tao... It's the life force we share with all living things. Spirit lives in everyone's heart. It's our basic nature. It's our connection with others, the world and the universe. It's why people go to churches, temples, synagogues and meditation centers. It's what people pray to. It's what we sense when we feel wonder or awe, as when we hear Ave Maria or Kol Nidre, chant Om, stand in a virgin forest, or hold a newborn in our arms.

Why does the spiritual lighten our burdens?

When we feel connected with something greater than our individual self, we relax more deeply and feel more satisfaction with what we already have. We can enjoy our life more fully and feel less driven to fill some void. And we don't have to anesthetize ourselves with excessive food, alcohol, or other forms of consumption.

We can learn to loosen our grip on life and on having to have it all to be exactly the way we want it to be, and we can learn to extract the nutrients from the good we do, the effort we make, the small successes we achieve -- then we can appreciate the positives in life and we feel enriched and lighter.


What's your background?

We were both raised to welcome and learn from all traditions and teachings. Diane grew up in a liberal Christian family whose closest friends and neighbors were Jewish, so she celebrated both Christian and Jewish holidays. Jonathan's family were Reform Jews and they celebrated each December with a Menorah and a Christmas tree.

Jonathan studied philosophy and religion for six years at NYU and the New School for Social Research, and did his PhD thesis on an eastern spiritual view of western psychotherapy in 1976. Both of us studied and practiced meditation, prayer and the practices that constitute the heart of the major world's religions -- and LWW is the result of our experience and knowledge.


Why did you write Losing the Weight of the World?

We're normal Americans with careers, chores and children, and we wanted to lighten our own load, lose the weight of the world we were carrying, and integrate our spiritual nature into our daily lives. And we wanted to help others lighten their burdens and live more spiritual lives as well.

We also wanted to get to the heart of the world's major religions, describe many of their commonalties, and make the experiential technique and emphasis of the eastern traditions accessible to busy westerners, so we all can live more spiritually uplifting daily lives. It's possible for people to have more spiritual peace of mind, while still living normal lives with jobs and families. We don't have to be perfect or live in a monastery to lose the weight of the world. We can do it right here, right now, if we know how. LWW teaches many ways to do exactly that.


Your last book was about sex. Why spirituality now?

Why Men Don't Get Enough Sex and Women Don't Get Enough Love (Pocket Books, 1991) was a serious answer to why men and women have a hard time meeting each others needs for physical and emotional intimacy. It teaches couples how to achieve spiritual union and intimacy. LWW is an extension of our lifelong interest in spirituality, and teaches how each of us can be more intimate with life.

Tell us about Losing the Weight of the World. (Doubleday, April 1997)

LWW is a spiritual psychology for the 21st century. It blends together the knowledge and techniques of modern psychology with eternal spiritual principles shared by the world's major religions (like prayer, presence, Golden Rules, goodness, Oneness...).

It shows how to live a more spiritual life in the midst of families, friends, careers, chores and children.

Daily life is hard and we carry many burdens. We want to feel calm, cool and contented, but we're hurried, harried and hassled. Each day we struggle to pay the rent and read about murder, rape, and kidnappings in the newspaper, and then at night we see more killing, dishonor and dishonesty on TV. Millions understandably feel uptight, worried and insecure. But we aren't sure how to achieve a genuine peace of mind in the midst of all our worries and burdens.

Our lives are busy and fast, and we're weighed down by the pace.

Maybe we feel we're just surviving, just getting through the day. Something's missing, but it's not clear what it is. We know we're not living as full and enriching a life as we could be living.


You've mentioned that we need to 'extract the nutrients' from our daily life. Can you give us an example?

A radio newscaster was telling us she started a campaign to raise money for an injured, hospitalized child in the morning, but was entirely focused on dealing with her demanding boss, a backstabbing colleague and intense job pressure. When she went home at the end of her day she was really down and drained. Yet when she focused on the thousands of dollars she'd helped raise for the child's operation, she felt uplifted. When we learn to extract the nutrients from our good efforts and deeds, we're nourished and we lose some of the weight of worry and upset that we've been carrying.

What's the Spiritual Diet and what will it do for me?

We want to be healthier, happier and more spiritual, but we're struggling to survive and succeed and aren't sure how to do it. The Spiritual Diet is a self-help program that fosters personal and spiritual growth. It takes as little as 3 breaths -- that's about 30 seconds -- a day.

It combines an ancient technique of focusing the mind and combining our awareness and presence with other elements that lift us up and nurture our soul.

It begins with the Basic Spiritual Diet that stimulates the Relaxation Response -- which calms our mind and body and helps us sleep better at night and feel better during the day. When we combine relaxation and greater awareness in the present, as in the Basic Spiritual Diet, with prayer or love or basic goodness or our connectedness with others or with our purpose in life -- we lift our spirit and heal ourselves personally. The result is that the Spiritual Diet supercharges our spiritual aim and can be used in conjunction with any religious focus or belief.

The Spiritual Diet is not a diet in the sense that we're deprived of something we like in order to accomplish some goal. The Spiritual Diet nurtures and nourishes. It feeds and replenishes us personally and spiritually, helping find the source of our greatest strength, helping us wake up and enjoy life.

Try the Spiritual Diet for a month and see for yourself if it doesn't help you feel calmer and lighter, helping you lose the weight of the world. You'd probably see some early signs of improvement in a week.

The Spiritual Diet offers brief breaks to nourish you personally and spiritually. It's simple, fast, cheap, easy and non-fattening. It takes a minimum of three breaths a day to lose the weight of the world.

Life's a feast if we learn to enjoy it. We have to learn to extract the nutrients from the efforts we make and the good we do.

Life's a feast -- Enjoy today; Have a delicious day; Eat and be merry; Taste life's sweetness; Drink in the wonder of it all; Wake up and look around; Be here now.

Love and kindness are enriching. We can be nourished by more than our food -- the sweet smell of a rose, a loved one's smile, the satisfaction from helping and being helped. These are all small ways we find emotional and spiritual sustenance.

LWW uncovers our basic worth and shows us how to be more spiritual in the midst of it all.

It teaches how to live more fully and freely.

It offers spiritual experience with or without religion.

It uses practical applied principles common to major organized religions that we can use in the midst of daily life to be calmer and more spiritually awake.

It offers a menu of choices to help us live a more spiritual and personally meaningful life. It's important to understand sin and suffering, as all major religions teach, but we also need to emphasize our spiritual core of basic goodness, and appreciate our connectedness with that which lies beyond our self -- which lightens our load.


Tell us more about your book.

Life is a feast, yet millions of people are starved for spiritual nourishment. Whether you belong to an organized religion or are unaffiliated, LWW offers a plan to bring peace of mind and love to our hearts in the midst of daily life.

LWW aims to help you more clearly understand the burdens that are weighing you down, and show you what you can do about them. Then you can act to lighten your load.

It's a practical book and a set of techniques for people with active lives and careers. It helps you create a recipe that suits your own tastes and helps you help yourself to grow both personally and spiritually.

It provides a nurturing blend of personal satisfaction with spiritual awakening, a balance of psychological and spiritual self-help that we all need now.

The burdens we carry cloud our mind, close our heart, tighten our breath and block our spiritual awareness. Yet we can clarify and calm our mind, feel content and complete, have greater intimacy, deal with guilt and shame and pain, discover the wonder of our senses, find meaning and purpose, and live a vibrant and juicy life.

We've heard a lot of talk in recent years about family values. LWW shows what it means to live by the Golden Rules common to the world's religions, and to have basic goodness, courtesy, consideration, forgiveness, gratitude, honor, integrity and responsibility as part of daily family life.


What's the Basic Spiritual Diet?

It's a technique that offers moments of vacation throughout the day to relax us and to be more spiritual and personally healthier and happier. The BSD is an easy to use technique that requires no special equipment, can be done anywhere, anytime, alone or with others, it's easy, flexible, fast, portable, cheap, quiet, good for you personally and spiritually, is not strenuous, it's non-fattening and helps you lose the weight of the world. It doesn't impose or require any particular set of beliefs. LWW offers a Basic Spiritual Diet to lighten the load of our daily burdens -- stress, preoccupation and worry...

You talk a lot about awareness and presence. Why are they so important?

Awareness and presence are ancient spiritual themes that have been lost to the general population in the West, though always known to spiritual masters. The founders of the world's major religions -- Jesus, Moses, Buddha, Mohammed, Lao Tsu -- all clearly looked God in the face and had a direct mystical experience of Spirit, knowing that our basic nature is to be awake in the present moment; it's called divine consciousness or enlightenment

Consciousness in the present is the mind of Spirit; Love is its heart.


Is prayer or meditation important?

We each have a minimum daily requirement for moments of rest, meditation or prayer in which we let ourselves be aware in the present, and have a focused and peaceful mind, warmth of heart, and connectedness to something greater than our individual self.

Daily moments of consciously resting in the present, make us calmer and happier (even when we're hurried and hassled).

The difficulty is that too often, people pray or repeat a mantra in a routine, mindless manner. And they use it to seek personal satisfaction. It's important to do it with meaning and feeling, and to use it to not simply beg a higher power to satisfy one or another of our wishes, but to align ourselves with Spirit.


You emphasize Basic Goodness. What do you mean by it?

Our spiritual nature is inherently good and we contain this fundamental or basic goodness throughout our life. Too often people find themselves in compromising situations where they have to lie for their boss or in some way violate their own values and beliefs adding to our weight of the world and covering over our spiritual nature. And when we compromise this way, it's as if another stone has been added to our load, increasing our weight of the world.

And we're inundated by the darker side of life on TV, and in movies and the news -- all filled with violence, greed, and dishonesty. This creates tension and sadness, adding to our weight of the world.

But the words 'good' and 'God' have the same root, and our spiritual nature is basically good. So we can act out of our goodness, trying to make the world a better place, choosing to help, heal and forgive ourselves and others. Then we can lighten our load by appreciating the good we're trying to do, appreciating even our good intentions, and feel better about ourselves as a result.


What do you mean by excessive individualism? And why did you devote a whole chapter to it?
Human society has brought forth a strong emphasis on individual personality and individual rights, which has been very valuable, but can also be taken to the extreme. Some people are so narcissistic that they don't care about anyone but themselves. 'ME first' is their motto. Greed, inconsideration, robbery, rape, abuse, and environmental destruction are a few of the harmful effects of 'too much me'.

To mature personally and spiritually means that we come to see our self in what seemed to be other, so we feel caring and intimacy with people, nature, children in general, and future. When we gain a spiritual perspective, we realize that on a fundamental level, we are the world.

We may have many rights as individuals, but we also have responsibilities as members of groups to which we belong, such as our family, our country, our culture, and the natural world.

The future of our species depends on this key point. Do we each seek our own self-interest without regard for our shared greater good? A global society in the nuclear/computer/bioengineering age cannot afford excessive individualism.

We'd do well to learn to use the Native American philosophy of the 7th generation -- in making important decisions, we should consider the possible effects on our great, great.... grandchildren and act accordingly.


Why does Losing the Weight of the World matter?

LWW is life affirming, offering techniques to live a healthier, happier, more heartfelt, meaningful and spiritual life.

It takes aim at the source of so much human suffering and destructiveness -- the greed and selfishness of excessive individualism that harms all of us and our planet.

If we don't go into the nuclear, computerized, technologized, genetically engineered 21st century with solid, life-affirming values and a spiritual basis for a global society, we'll be in danger of losing our connection with our soul and our humanity.

LWW enriches our life personally and spiritually, lightening our load and helping us lose the weight of the world.




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